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Life is about choices. You make a lot of choices and then you die.
All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.
Nyquil: the night time, sneezing, coughing, why-in-the-heck-am-I-hallucinating medicine.
If I had known I was going to live this long I would have taken better care of myself.
How long a minute is depends on which side of the bathroom door you're on.
Isn't it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction listen to weather forecasts and economists?
There is scarcely anything in the world that some man cannot make a little worse, and sell a little more cheaply. The person who buys on price alone is this man's lawful prey.